Lost Inside
by Ms. AtomicBomb
Summary: Elizaveta Hedervary misses her childhood friend more than anyone else in the world. Human AU. Weirdest fic I have ever written, stupid as well. Human names used. Pruhun. Character deaths I guess. Again, I had written this so long ago! Like REAL long, and well I forgot to upload it. It might have billions of mistakes because it was one of my first fics. Please enjoy either way.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer! I do NOT own Hetalia, nor do I claim to~**

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My long brown wavy hair cascaded down like a waterfall on my slim, fit silhouette. My emerald green eyes were a bit puffy and red- I had been crying last night, though I wouldn't admit it. Just recently I had been going through a tough time. Having fights with my best friend, Gilbert, these were different though... I had actually said a bunch of things that I didn't even mean.

The flower in my hair had been dry for a day or two, It was hard to remember. "Rose?" I mumbled as I looked at all the flowers in the garden. I picked up a nice pink rose and stuck it in my hair gently.

I slowly walked to school, feeling tired and upset as I finally hit my locker. "Hey! Eliza!" A voice called. I turned to see Bell, a really good friend of mine. "Hey, Bell. How are you?" I asked.

"Oh I've been great! A-Are you okay?" Bell asked noticing my big puffy eyes.

"I'm just fine..."

"No you're not. Tell me. What's wrong?" She asked.

"Gil and I got in a huge fight..." I muttered.

"Don't worry, you'll be back to friends again."

"No...It was a nasty one. He had brought his girlfriend over and I told him that he shouldn't have done that because this was my house and we just fought from there."

"Oh come on it's not like he's going to choose the girl over you, Liz!"

"That's the thing... He did. He chose her over me, He told me that if I didn't respect her then we would stop being friends and I agreed. He hasn't called me back since." I sighed.

I saw that snow white hair and crimson eyes coming towards me. For a moment my hopes were flying until I saw her. Anneliese, she was a highly respected girl. Not like us though, she was just so rich. Any hope that I had in any part of my body shred to pieces.

Gilbert did a double take to look at me, I assume. He noticed my puffy crying eyes. "Hallo! Lizzie!" He called only to get a glare from his Aristocrat girlfriend. Her blond hair swung and her green eyes gave him a horrible look. Did her care? No way!

My head shot towards him, my eyes seemed to sparkle. "Hey Gil." I faintly whispered. "Umm, Anneliese. Can I meet you in class?" He asked her. "No, Don't leave me..Please?" She practically begged. "Just for today, love." Gil smiled and gave her a peck on the lips before walking towards me.

"Hey! I'm sorry about the other day, Liebling." He apologized. Whenever any German word tumbled out of his mouth I would not understand. "Liebling? What is that?" I questioned. "Oh no don't worry. Nothing important um what I said the other day, I actually didn't mean that." He sighed.

"Why didn't you call me?" I asked.

"Well, Anne didn't let me..."

"Wow she's a bit too protective." I muttered.

"I'm sorry. Um maybe we can have lunch together. It would be nice." His crimson eyes smiled. "Yeah okay..." I agreed and began walking away from him with Bell tailing behind me. "See? I told you." Bell teased. "Hey! There's something up..." I muttered.

As we walked to class and sat down I smiled unconsciously. Bell was right. I mean we always get into fights but this time we didn't apologize fast enough, That was great, At least we're getting over it.

Soon enough the day went by and before I knew it, it was lunch. I smiled brightly and walked to my locker. To my surprise, Ms. Aristocrat stood in front of it. "Took you long enough." She hissed as I reached the locker. Her hands were on her waist and this dirty look was plastered on her face. "Why the hell are you here?" I spat. "I simply wanted to tell you something that was bothering me." She responded.

"Sure Gilbert is not the most studious boy in school but he has potential. Guess who's holding him back?" She questioned.

"You?" I smirked and gave her small glare.

"Ha, ha. Funny." Anneliese spat. "Look, You're holding him back if you haven't noticed. You are somehow just making him stuck. You're making him go after you like a lost puppy and it's annoying. Just stop being friends with him." She added.

"A lost puppy? Follows me? Are you kidding me? If anything he is being pushed around by you." I hissed back and slammed my locker now the whole hallway had their eyes on us.

"Care to quiet down, Turul? Or should I say Mountain Goat?" Anneliese sassed. My eyes grew wide with fury. "Are you serious? Did you just call me what I think- No, you respect me. You don't have to get animals into this conversation got it, Gorilla?" The words escaped my lips so quickly. Yet I don't regret what I said.

Her face was priceless, she was embarrassed and pissed out of her mind. A hand flew up in the air and struck me across the face. My hand twitched for my pan. Lucky thing I left it at my house, or else this girl would be an omelette in less than thirty seconds.

The hall was crowded with people. That chant floated above the crowd. "Fight! Fight! Fight!" People cheered. My hand became a fist. Better give the crowd what they want. There we go, I punched that picture perfect face of hers. "Ow!" She yelled with a gasp.

I rolled up my sleeves and readied my arms. "Don't mess with me." I hissed. She gave me a strong glare and tried to punch back. I stopped her before her hand made contact with my chest. What kind of rings does she wear? One's with knives for a diamond?

She actually knew how to fight, wow! That was impressive. As I held her fist in my hand I gave her a blow to the stomach. The Ooohs, Ahhs danced in the crowd. As I let her fist go something dripped down to my elbow. Blood. I looked at her rings and sure enough they had mini blades. "You-" Her hand punched my jaw hard. The three blades dug in. The agony began.

I held my screams back and swallowed them. She kept on punching me and I tried my best to protect my torso and face. People had just gone quiet now. No one said a word at all. She cornered me against a wall and held my arms up with her left hand. They were bloody from the many cuts they endured.

I longed for my pan now, but I would never get it. My brown hair was all messed up and the bangs covered my eyes. Her Yellow eyes stared at me and she smirked. "Any last words?" She hissed.

Was I really going to die now? I mean Honestly? In this school, With everyone looking at me? Why not get a teacher? Or Call the Cops? I gulped as a long dagger that she pulled out of nowhere was pressed to my throat.

The metallic taste of my own blood was somehow refreshing but no words left my mouth.

"Anneliese! What the hell are you doing?!" I heard Gilbert yell. He pushed her away from me and I fell to the floor. "What took you so long?" I coughed with a smirk on my face. He ignored me and as he did so my eyelids fell heavy and I shut them. I could hear Bell's voice asking If I were okay and I nodded. My eyes flew open as Anneliese yelled at Gilbert.

"Do you love her or something?!" She yelled.

"You can't go killing people!" Gilbert yelled.

"Killing? I'm doing you a favour! She's holding you back! Fine It's either me or her!"

"What?! Are you kidding me! If you don't want to get arrested, Leave."

"Her?! Really? B-But you're my boyfriend!"

"I can't date people who are going to kill my friends." Gilbert turned around and walked towards me. I heard Anneliese's heals clatter down the hall. Finally teacher's had shown up. Everyone surrounded me. They hung over my like millions of leaves on a tree.

"Are you okay, lizzie?" Gilbert asked.

"Yeah.." I mumbled.


	2. Chapter 2

After the whole commotion I had passed out. Sure, I had blacked out but that didn't mean that Anneliese wasn't going to get away with it. I was ready to kick her sorry -Butt, Let's just put it that way. I don't want to start cussing.

I woke up in a dark room. Maybe it was just night time but man it was dark. It smelled of something like pennies or coins in that matter. My head ached and I tried to remember what had happened.

My eyes began adjusting to the dark and that's when I noticed I was in a hospital bedroom. What? It wasn't that bad right? I mean I didn't loose blood or anything. Well at least_ that_ much blood...Right?

The door slowly opened and the light from the hallway poured in causing me to fall back on the bed and shield my eyes with the covers. "Well you're probably still asleep, But I came to visit you again. Just 'cause I feel sorry about what happened." A voice whispered. It was a male's, But I doubted it was G-"Yeah, You probably are hating on me right now, It was my fault that I didn't break up with the chick when you told me." He added.

It was Gilbert!

"Well, I just came to say that She got arrested, and I got you these flowers." He set them down as what I assume was a table beside me and uncovered my face. Of course I had my eyes closed, I was pretending to be sleeping and he believed it. Can you believe that? He kissed me on the forehead softly "Gute Besserung" He whispered.

I could feel myself heat up. Did he really want me to hit him? My hand started to reach for anything that I could whack him with but I had no luck. He walked towards the door and stood still for a bit. I had an urge to say something or at least do something but I didn't.

"I hope you like Cornflowers and Roses." Gilbert announced and walked out the door, Gently closing it behind him. "I do." I softly responded and prompted myself up.

Darkness had over taken the room once more. I sat still in the dark not gazing at the flowers. Yet somehow my eyes wondered and found themselves looking straight at the bouquet. It was neatly decorated and it looked ever so beautiful. "Hmm, You out did your self, Gil. They look amazing." The words escaped my lips but I didn't want to fly across the room to catch them.

As I reached for them I noticed that my arms were covered with many bandages. Did that do this? The flowers awaited my soft touch but I just gazed at my hurt arms. Who cares! The flowers! I finally set my trembling hand on them and pulled them closer to myself.

I turned on the night light and looked at them. The lovely white roses brought brightness while the blue corn flowers brought life to the bouquet. In the middle of the gorgeous thing there was a light blue envelope. It looked as if the flowers had intertwined to make the envelope. I took it in my hands and opened it. The letter read:

_My Dearest Lizzie, _

_Hey! Okay so it's so unawesome of me to write stupid letters but seeing as you are in a bad condition this is the only way I could contact you. The awesome me is not doing such an awesome thing at the moment as you are reading this. It's been two days and you haven't woken up. I blame myself for that. _

_And so because I wasn't there to help you when you needed it, I am saying goodbye. I adore you and please be a good girl because I can't be beside you all the time. But I will be watching over you. Just know that I'll go wherever you will go. _

_If you haven't figured this out already I am committing suicide. I love you with my entire being. I will be dying where we first met. At least I'll end life where my it had started. _

_Yours Truly, _

_~ Gilbert Weilshmidt _

What the heck did I just read? D-Did I just read Gilbert's suicide note? No, This is a joke right? I mean Gil? Committing suicide? No way! That's not him!

I struggled to get up. I ripped out any IV that was in me at the time and grabbed the flowers. Now would the doctors try to pin me down and think I'm Psycho? Who cares!

I began to run out the door and into the hall. No one cared the least at this moment but soon enough Nurses began to follow me. What's not suspicious about a girl in a medical robe and flowers in her hand? To make it worse I was crying! And I **never** cried. This was serious.

I could have sworn that it was like a pack of lionesses hunting a Zebra. And they were damn hungry!

I ran down the stairs and out the hospital. Why waste my time on the elevator? That's when I noticed the freezing air and the even more cold floor. Great I had no shoes. Now to run without getting hurt, even though my body already ached and longed for warmth.

I arrived at the playground. And sure enough over the same exact tree that we had met he was ready to hang himself. I panted and coughed. "Are you an IDIOT!" I yelled. He turned to look at me with his sad, desperate eyes.

The boy I had known forever. The boy I adored so much-My best friend- was committing suicide. His crimson sad eyes stared at me with grief and loneliness.

"You must be!" I yelled. He kept silent and just locked his gaze on me. "Are you listening to me? Why the heck would you commit suicide?" I asked and ran over to him. His eyes began to water; they became home to many tears and the sobs slipped out of his mouth. "Are you stupid!" I asked. He half smiled and nodded. "Yes." He whispered and hugged me.

His arms were so warm that for a moment I had forgotten it was winter, I had forgotten it was snowing. I felt relieved being wrapped in his arms. "I hate you." I whispered and he chuckled. "Why is that?" His voice cracked. "Why would you want to commit suicide Gil? Tell me." I asked.

He sounded so distant when he said the words. "Because I need to. There's no reason for me to live."

My heart dropped. This couldn't really be coming out of his mouth, this was so not him. The awesome Prussia was so not like this.

"Elizaveta. We should get back to the hospital. You're freezing, and it's all my fault." He said and picked me up bridal style. The warmth he radiated was no longer comforted me. The cold struck me once again and I began to shiver.

Guess what awaited me in the entrance of the hospital? None other than the many nurses that chased after me. "It was my fault for making her run away. Just let me take her to her room, and please do not think she's mentally Ill." Gilbert explained and did just as he said. He set me down on the bed and smiled at me. "Don't tell anyone about what I was about to do." He whispered and sat down on the chair.

"You can't leave me got it!" I yelled. My voice whimpered and I noticed I was crying. He looked at me and nodded. "Got it." He whispered. "You read the note, right?" He asked and looked around.

"Yes... I love you too." I whispered back. My heart began to pound faster but was it good to confess after a suicide attempt?

"I love you." He said and stood up. "Well, I should be going now." He started his way to the door and I nearly yelled at him. "No! You're staying here. I can't trust you right now." I was true, at the moment I didn't. Who would? After a suicide attempt? That wasn't possible. "You are not leaving me. Until I say so."

He nodded and sat back down on the chair. I felt so tired but I kept my eyes on him. No way was I going to sleep right now. Not at all. And so I stayed awake the whole night, and so did he. We just stared at each other the entire time.

I sat up and sighed. "Jo Reggelt." I yawned. "Guten Morgen." He nodded and smiled at me. "You should get some rest." He whispered and as soon as he said that I fell sleep over take me. I fell asleep so easily.

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After I was released from the hospital - which was not a long time- I moved in with Gilbert. I was concerned over his mental state at the time. Not saying he was mentally ill but he just wasn't in a good state at all.

"You make me feel like I'm going to be a suicide bomber or something. Just calm down." Gilbert turned on the Television. "Nope, We're going to hear songs today." I ignored his comment and turned the T.V off. I began to play songs from my Ipod. The first song that came up was Muse's 'Feeling Good'. I nearly laughed at it but I then sat beside Gilbert and rested my head on his shoulder. "Please don't be idiotic. I'm only watching over you." I whispered.

He kissed my forehead and began to sing along. "And I'm feeling good." He whispered in my ear huskily. It sent shivers down my spine but I kept quiet. "You're an idiot." I whispered. Right there I knew his lips formed as smirk.

Many days passed. Gilbert and I had been having a great time. You could say that we were dating... Actually we never really confirmed that at all but still. We hadn't kissed but we would definantly stay up till 3 in the morning just talking about when we were younger. The fights we used to have. The animals we used to hunt and everything. It was actually fun having him around. I didn't feel as lonely as when my parents died. He was there the whole time.

"Lizzie. Want mashed potatoes?" Gilbert yelled from the kitchen.

"Yes!" I exclaimed back. I put on The Twilight Zone episodes. Gilbert and I would have a marathon every Friday. It was fun. Today we were watching "Nightmare at 20,000 Feet" It was actually quiet scary.

There he came with a smile on his face and plates of mashed potatoes and steaks. He sat down next to me and set the plates on the coffe table. Which consisted of many Beatles' books. I was a die hard fan of them. The food looked delicious but at the moment I was not hungry so instead I just snuggled into Gilbert's chest.

The episode had finished and I noticed I was now on his lap. I looked up at him as the next episode started- it was automatic. He looked sweet and calm. "Gil." I whispered ghostly. It was a surprise he even heard my voice. "Ja, Lizzie?" He whispered back. "I hate you."

He cracked a cute smile. "I love you too." He whispered back. Darkness over took the house as the sun began to set. He kept his eyes on me. They were some what intiminating but still full of love. He leaned down and pressed his lips against mine gently. He kissed me and I kissed back.

The house went quiet as I pulled away. We both smiled at each other and I paused the Twilight Zone episode and sat up. "That was my first kiss." I mumbled. Gilbert could see me blush through the darkness and chuckled. "I am aware." He whispered and kissed me once more.

I heard my bedroom door open. A man entered the living room and stopped as soon as he saw us looking at him. "Don't move." He whispered and pointed a knife at us. I reached for my pan and held it in my hands. He saw me move and glared at me. He had ocean blue ayes and blond hair. Somewhat older than us. But he stood there. With a threatning look.

"What do you want?" Gilbert hissed. He narrowed his eyes at the man. I just kept quiet and held onto my pan tighter. "If it's not noticible yet I'm stealing." The man smirked. He took out my mother's Golden watch out of his pant pocket and teased us with it.

"No!" I yelled and reached for it but was pulled back onto Gilbert's lap. "Carefull. He most likely has a gun. I'll get it." He whispered in my ear. He moved me aside. As the man dashed out of the house, Gilbert trailed behind. I followed as well.

We ran out to the park. Bang! I heard a shot. I saw Gilbert slow down but he tried to run.

He fell.

Under the tree. Where-like Gilbert said- My life started. He knelt there and I ran to him. His black wife beater was wet and his no longer white pants were drenched in a red liquid. I teared up. My hands held onto him tightly. "Don't cry." Gilbert tried to chuckled. Endless tears ran down my cheeks and fell onto him. I pulled out my phone and called the ambulance.

I saw the Gun near by and kissed Gilbert Before looking for the bastard.

Rage had taken over me. I found him on the floor. He had tripped. Yes, I may be cruel but I killed him. I killed the man who shot Gilbert. With the same exact gun.

I ran back to Gilbert happy to see him still alive. I was still holding then gun though, I set it beside me not regretting a thing. "I'm sorry. You shouldn't have done that. You shouldn't have gone after him." I rocked him in my arms- crying. "Stay with me. Okay?" He smiled.

Blood covered the snow and it seemed to drown me. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I will. I love you, Gil. I love you so much." I cried over him only holding him closer. I kissed him. A lot. The blood smeered on my lips but I didn't care. At least he'd tried to kiss me back. "I love you too." He whispered and with that his body went limp. I tasted both the saltiness of my tears and the metallic irony taste of the blood.

White and Red where the last colours I saw. Just like Gilbert's eyes and Hair. The snow and blood.

The last colours.

I commited suicide. I took a bullet to my head.

**The End**


End file.
